Slip ‘n Slide

Posted on March 8, 2021 by Sharon

Leave it to my boyfriend to come up with something silly to do with a backyard toy. We were house sitting for some friends of ours and they were away for a week and took their child with them. They have a lot of fun stuff, that’s why we volunteered to house sit. Pool table, hot tub, and apparently, a slip ‘n slide in the yard their son uses. My boyfriend immediately got it going and came up with the naughty use we could put it to. The yard has plenty of privacy, so why not. I was game to try.

I sat down at the end of it, all wet, and waited for him to slide into me and my pussy. He certainly did. I must say, it was the most fun and energetic time I’ve ever had being licked out. It was kind of fun, outdoors, with the breeze and the water and silliness of it all. If you can’t have fun during sex, when can you? So after he slid into me, I sort of leaned back on my hands and let him go to work. He held open my pussy lips and exposed my clit, sucking on it and working his tongue over it.

It felt so good, the way he was lavishing all that attention on me and my wet, shaved cunt, right there out in the open. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes and just gave in to the sensations of his tongue teasing me and slipping in and out of me. It was a memorable time to be sure. I’d hazard a guess no one else in the home had used the backyard toy to this purpose before. I grabbed his head and really shoved it into my cunt and he licked faster and faster until I came on his face. He then came up and kissed me and we fucked right there as the water squirted over us.

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Big Titted Catfight

Posted on March 1, 2021 by Sharon

This one odd caller with a large breasted wife tells me she likes to get into fights with other women proving her breasts are bigger. I’m sure this is mostly his fantasy, since it seems hard to believe a grown woman in her forties would be acting like some middle school mean girl. In any case, he shares pics of his large breasted wife, and then his even bigger breasted secretary, saying even though the secretary is larger, his wife still claims she is, it’s a ridiculous conversation. So then he shows pics of the secretary, and hers do appear larger, which apparently wifey is very angry about, she wants to be the biggest!

Then he shares how his big busted wife looks for other big breasted types when she’s out and about and bumps into them, boob to boob, sometimes sending them back, flat on their ass, or her flat on hers. Yeah, ok, this happens all the time in public I’m sure, some strange big titted woman ramming herself into other big breasted woman in some kind of boob butting contest in the store aisles. You want bigger lady, get implants, be the biggest of the big with your basketball sized breasts.

Some of the things callers tell you on the phone are just beyond absurd, but you go along with it and listen to them and answer their questions about your breasts and your bra size and how you could boob butt wifey with the best of them, if given a chance. You’d send the old cow back on her ass as he looks on in amusement at the flopping boobs on the both of you as you struggle to regain your footing, since you’re so top heavy it’s all you can do to stay upright. The thing is, although they are large in the pics, they are not freakishly large the way he describes. Just a guy with a very active imagination and love of big boobs and catfights, all rolled into one.

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Behold, the Ass

Posted on February 22, 2021 by Sharon

I was having a conversation recently with a man that stated emphatically that he would not even consider dating a woman if she had a flat ass. Only bubble butts for him. Well I hate to break it to ya, but there’s far more women with a flat ass than a bubble butt. Some men think they are just entitled to what they deem is the only option. I say buy a sex doll you can have customized to have a Kardashian like ass if you feel this is your only physical body type that is capable of arousing you.

It’s funny to find pics online of the most extreme examples and hear them yammer on about them. They even would encourage a woman to have a Brazilian butt lift cosmetic surgery. Which is the most dangerous cosmetic procedure there is with the highest death rate. If you want surgery fine, but do it for yourself, not to please some dope who thinks you need to physically alter yourself to meet their ideal. If you have the big booty, great, some men will worship it, want to lick it, fuck it, finger it, be smothered by it.

The appeal of the bubble butt is lost on me, but I realize it’s popular to have such a bum these days. Doggy style sex gives men the perfect vantage point to look down on that ass and give it a smack as they give you a pounding. That bouncy, jiggly ass is the favorite body part of many, the big boobs don’t do it for everyone out there. For some, the junk in the trunk is the most arousing part they can feast their eyes on and stick their dick in. A bootylicious ass might be the ticket to your anal fantasies come true.

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He Submits to Her

Posted on February 15, 2021 by Sharon

There’s a funny older man that’s been calling and his calls are not sexual, they are calls confessing his submission to someone that works in his office. I always laugh when he tells me his latest tale. He’s from India and older and has lived her a few years. He’s an office manager. There’s a few women that work under him, but that hasn’t stopped one of them from recognizing his submissive tendencies and exploiting them. Whether what he tells me is true or not, I’ve no idea, but they are funny calls.

He’s in his fifties and the women he is the manager of are in their late twenties. He said one day it had been raining and the one girl got some rain on her suede shoe and she asked him to dry it off. He was shocked at such a request from an underling, but he saw no harm, so he bent down and dried her shoe. She was soon telling him he was going to be shining her shoes on a regular basis now. He didn’t complain. He just shined the shoes she left for him in his office.

Then not long after he said she told him her cleaning lady had quit and she was needing someone to take her place and she thought his wife might do to replace her. Again he was shocked, but they needed the extra money, so he and his wife soon began to clean her condo. He said she does pay them, it’s just it doesn’t seem normal or right that the office manager would be doing this for an underling. He said she’s impossible to say no to. So now he washes her floor and cleans her toilet while his wife does the rest of the cleaning. I always wonder what crazy tales he will come out with next. You hear all sorts of crazy stories when you offer phone sex.

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Silent Caller

Posted on February 8, 2021 by Sharon

Many not familiar with the many intricacies of phone sex might not know much, if anything, about silent callers. These are guys that for whatever reason cannot talk back. Thin walls, wife in next room, some callers have even confessed their wife is asleep right next to them as they are jerking off, nearly motionless with the phone pressed to their ear. You wouldn’t think some would be so bold as to attempt that, but they are. A horny man will go to great lengths to relieve that situation, even taking what to others might seem an obviously foolish risk.

Even the threat of getting caught will not stop some men from doing this. Many will message you ahead of time to ask if it’s alright, many girls will not do a silent call for various reasons. Others will only talk in a very faint whisper so as not to be discovered. When I say hello and no one replies at places where they’ve prepaid, I ask them to press a button on the phone if they cannot speak, then I hear a beep, it’s quite absurd really, yet it is fairly common. The button pressing mutes I call them, lol.

One can only picture them, laying in silence next to their cold, sexless wives, stroking so gently as to not rock the bed in any way, living in their silent state of horniness that will only be quelled by a stranger talking dirty to them over the phone as they furtively masturbate. Some will watch porn with their earbuds on and take care of themselves that way, others will reach out to phone sex girls and just be happy to hear a voice, even if they are not free to speak back or even tell you what they like. If they message before they call, at least they can state what sort of a scenario they want, others that have not, you just have to go to some generic suck and fuck call most seem to be happy with.

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